PixelPie Photos

Dynamic Women

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 08:30:00 +0000

March 4th of this year was the last I blogged. Tsk, tsk. I failed on my promise to keep up writing and I’m full of excuses. I’ve definitely had a crazy, busy year and it’s only going to get busier as I am very close to bringing a third baby into our family. December is the month of choice so I’m hoping this baby just appears in my stocking and I don’t have to go through the whole labor thing again. Don’t roll your eyes, Santa can do miracles… that’s if I’m on the ‘Nice’ list this year but I digress.

With the busy year I had, my photographer colleagues had an equally if not a busier year than I (and some how THEY manage to blog; you can roll your eyes now because I am) so we decided that a Year End Weekend Excursion was the only way to actually get some time to bond with friends, grab a camera to snap pictures of things and each other just for the pure joy of celebrating each other as artists, photographers as well as one dynamic group of women.

These women all have so many characteristics and attributes that envelop them that it was extremely difficult to choose a single word to place in front of them, essentially defining how you see them, then snap a picture but that’s exactly what Hope thought would be a vastly fun activity. And it was, except for the noodles that I have in my head for brain matter these days. I was terribly limited in the words I choose for these women but I went with my gut, sometimes choosing the most simplistic language and other times stretching ever so slightly out on the vocabulary limb. To compensate for my Noodle Head, I want to elaborate on each of these images just a tad with a few more words that I think every one of these women share.

Amy. Loving.
Amy has such a bright spirit that you can’t help feel nothing but love and warmth when you are around her. She bubbles with joy and laughter and radiates happiness. She feels deeply and when you talk with her, you know she’s truly there with you. A very passionate, loving woman.

Hope. Authentic.
She is who she says she is, and she is true. Hope is very genuine about who she is and what she creates as a photographer, a mom, a wife and a friend. She will always speak with integrity and strength and each word is saturated with a reflection of her own heart and emotions. She wears her heart on the outside, walks with her gut and sees the world with an expressive eye. You won’t meet more of an authentic, dynamic woman than Hope.

Amber. Inspired.
Amber breathes inspiration. She sees it in every angle of the world around her. One look at her photography and you can feel the talent emanated from her images. One conversation with her and you can see the passion and zest she has all coated in pure sweetness. She makes you feel so inspired that you want to dance in the rain with her. Beautiful Amber.

Lareina. Considerate.
A kindness eludes from Lareina that is nothing but honest and gentle. She defines the word ‘kind’ but I think that she is above all the most considerate person I have ever met. She is charitable, she is generous, she is compassionate, and she is thoughtful. Not to mention that she can make you laugh and smile at any moment. Lareina is the most approachable woman that when you meet her, you know you’ve made an instant friend.

Lisa. Dedicated.
Lisa is a very dedicated to her family, her job, her photography and her friends but it’s her dedication to sincerity, loyalty, truthfulness, and her giving heart that made me think of this word for her. It’s not easy to be consistent when you go through life but you know with Lisa that no matter what she goes through or what comes her way, she will dig in deep and come out with gracefulness. She scatters confidence when she walks and brings such a positive energy to the world. Lisa is wholehearted.

Christine. Genuine.
As soon as I looked over at Christine I knew no other word that could encompass such a true person. Christine is one of the most infectious people I have ever met sprinkling her happiness, beauty, wit, and her charm on every person in the room. Her charismatic personality is unmistakable but it is also evident she lives her life with integrity, strength, and genuineness. She cares deeply for all that surrounds her and can somehow magically capture that behind the lens. Christine makes me happy.

In fact this whole weekend made me happy. I loved everything about the getaway. The people, the cameras, the photos, but mostly I loved the quiet, stillness and the crispy, cold air smelling of wood burning stoves. It was a beautiful weekend filled with an incredible peace and serenity. I can’t wait until the next one when more incredible woman can join us!

To view more photos from the weekend, feel free to click on any image in this post!

I See Moments.

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 11:53:00 +0000

I received an email tonight from a student entering a Digital Photography program and needed to write a report as part of the application process. She wrote me asking a few basic questions to get a photographer's view. These few questions prompted me to start writing again, something that I have thoroughly lacked the inspiration to do lately until I got these:

-What are your favorite things about being a photographer?
-Least favorite?  
-What made you decide to become make a career out of photography?
- Do you have a favorite type of photo to take? Why? 
-How long did it take you to establish yourself as a professional? Was it a difficult path?
- Do you think a certain personality type/individual is needed to become successful?  
-Finally, what are your hours like? Do you have lots of free time? Or is it busy, busy all the time?

Theses are wonderful questions to ask, but there are definitely no short answers. You have caught me at the right time to ask me these, as I am right in the middle of ‘establishing’ myself with a photographer’s career.

Believe it or not but the hardest question for me to answer is what are my favorite things about being a photographer. I think because it hits on a much deeper level than something like my career path or the hours I run in a day.

Every answer I want to give you seems so cliché yet it can’t be any truer. I like taking pictures. I see moments in my life, in my children’s lives, my families, and in people around me that I just want to put a frame around. To frame it and say “I like that. That is true. That needs to be kept.”

I never had a rich history in photography. I was never one of the lucky ones to spend hours learning about film development and darkrooms. I was one that was lucky enough to have a disposable before I could even buy a wind-up, point and click, film camera. And my photos weren’t fantastic, not award winning, but they were my pictures and that was good enough.

I never even thought I’d ever get the chance to pursue photography; it was a passing thought but nothing that was eminent in my future. Not until I was more established in my life, with a supportive family at my side, I watched my children learning new and wonderful things that I reached for a camera again and couldn’t stop clicking. I fell in love with it again and this time wanted to learn the method behind the madness.

I met a wonderful photographer who soon became a great friend and pedagogue that soon put me on my feet. I took her courses and soaked up her knowledge, the knowledge of Google, the knowledge of books, magazines, and the best place, behind the lens.

The career in photography came because I have two small children and a hard-working, loving husband that all give so much to me, I wanted to give back what I could to them. I didn’t just want to have a glorified hobby. Not only does it allow me to continue to do what I love, I get to meet fantastic people and get to play a small part in their lives too. I thrive on people and their energy they bring. Whatever the photo session, be it a wedding, a newborn or toddler session, families, couples, or boudoir, people bring their energy and put it on display. The energy of their love and their desire to capture a memory that they will keep for the rest of their life is huge and it’s amazing to be able to share in that.

Even when people aren’t at their best and difficult times are at hand, they turn to pictures to either keep memories near by or see how far they’ve come or still have to go.

Pictures are forever in our life and I love being able to help frame it.

Favorite pictures to take are pictures that speak a story to me. I don’t have a favorite scene that I want to photograph over and over rather the people in that scene. If I am connected to them or I can live in their shoes for a day, those are the pictures I want to take.

There are so many different types of personalities of photographers it’s impossible to say this one will be successful and the other not. People relate differently to one another and although one photographer may not match their personality taste it doesn’t make them less successful. There are incredibly smart, business and marketing people that have taken their small business of photography to a high level and there are others that still work from their home, one client at a time, and they are deemed successful as well. It all comes down to the passion they have behind the lens and whether or not they stay true to who they are and what they love.

As a photograph in a business sense, it can be very long and tedious startup or it can be quick and painless depending on so many factors. The biggest factor is the statistics are against small business owners at the get-go knowing that the majority will fail within 3 years. It can be argued that photography is a novelty, a luxury, more of a have than a have-not. It can also be argued that the market is over saturated or on the other side of the spectrum that there’s not enough good photographers out there for as many babies and weddings that occur. It all depends on what your own outlook is and where you feel you fit in. If you think you can make a niche for yourself and truly believe in who you are and what you do, then, well, you can do anything.

The hours I keep are another story all in itself. It could relate to being a genetic disposition that I seem to frequently be up during late hours, or it could be that I can’t properly rest knowing that I have a gazillion things to do and if I want to spend any valuable time with my kids the next day, it’s best I catch up when I am the least likely to be interrupted. Growing a business, and trying to grow it with smarts, means many hours researching and reading, trying to improve, and trying to learn everything from bookkeeping, website structures, marketing, and gain an efficient workflow. Processing photos is certainly one step of photography that is not to be overlooked as that can eat up a huge chunk of time if you aren’t careful. The digital age brought a lot to the table but the fact that it’s ridiculously easy to snap 1000 photos it is no small feat to sort, pick and choose, process, edit, and render your vision of the photo. If only the digital era can bring with it a digital camera sensor that can see what you see. The human eye should never be taken for granted. It is powerful.

Striking a balance is something that I don’t think any photographer can say is easy. It is a constant battle of your management skills to give yourself 100% to your craft and your business, and a 100% more to your family. And if you can squeeze in the extra 100% you need for your friends. It’s a struggle you’ll see posted on many blogs and forums. There’s a reason that I turned the “Time Posted” off of my blog. There’s also a reason the clock is now sitting at 4:38 a.m.

Of course you can pick and choose what you do, when you do it, who you meet with and who you don’t but it’s all how it translates to your own life, your own values and your own photographic journey that will deem you a success or not. A success in business, a success at balance, a success with your images, or success with your family. In any right, I wish you much success in your choice of career and camera. If I have a vote, it’s for a Nikon, but from the words of my Pedagogue and many, many other photog’s, “It’s NOT about the camera!”

I wish you much luck with your application process and apologize for being a tad verbose with your questions but that, I also believe is a genetic disposition that my husband can only roll his eyes at. If I haven’t scared you off with such a lengthy dialogue, please feel free to ask anything else and I will try to help if I can.

Cheers!

Get Crackin'

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 08:30:00 +0000

I just finished saying how I was sick of eating Egg Salad sandwiches, and I am. But now I am just as tired of eating Macaroni and Potato salad too. If I only had to eat it in the summer time, while sipping lemonade, fine. But for some reason, these foods are staples at a Funeral. Mention “Funeral” and I see Eggs.

We have just come home from yet another funeral. We are up to 5. I don’t know if I can handle anymore. This Memorial we came from today was a friend of my Husbands. They grew up together, him and his brothers. They went to school together. They played together. They farmed together. They hunted together. He was a young man with nothing but the gentlest heart and spirit. He worked hard and loved his family. He loved his friends. And everybody knew it.

Close to 600 people were in attendance today. To honor Clinton and celebrate the kind of man he was. They wanted to show support to his Mom and Dad and his two Brothers and Sister-in-Law. His Uncle spoke with such pride about his nephew, speaking nothing that wasn’t already known but every bit worth mentioning.

I am sad by the sudden tragedy of his death and sad that the world had to lose such a person. I am sad knowing that his Mom and Dad have lost a piece of their heart but pray steadily that they will fill it up with the comfort and support from those 600 people.

Today as we travelled home I was really struck with the finality of it all. I know what death means. I know that it happens to us all eventually or we will be affected by it or have already been. I know it is something that is possibly one of my greatest fears. It’s not like I’ve had some sort of sudden brainwave or iconic theory sculpting in my grey matter. It’s been said before. I don’t know by whom. For all I know, it could have been You. And it’s not that I haven’t thought it either but it was always a passing “Ya I know that” kinda’ thing.

This time, as we were leaving yet another Funeral, leaving behind loved ones to cope through their grief, I was really hit with the fact that in a matter of a split second, a matter of 5 minutes, a matter of one hour, your life can suddenly change.

Then we drove by a car on its side in the ditch.

~Sigh~

I kept thinking about this as I sat next to my Husband who was still reeling with his grief, as I kept turning around trying to soothe my poor baby who was extremely tired of her carseat, and as I kept tending to a very overtired two-year-old boy who just couldn’t decide what he wanted.

Then we were diverted off of the Highway for a “Police Emergency Up Ahead” sign.

~Bigger Sigh~

This is what I got in life. I’ve got a minivan filled with 2 tiny people, 1 loving man, a mess only the dump would love, my camera, a couple of books beside me, a wallet that reminds me of bills to pay, debt to hold off some more, and things I still want, my phone that makes my Facebook friends appear and a busy calendar that reminds me of days ahead.

I’ve got my fingers and toes, all the joints and muscles to move them with, my eyes and ears, my nose to smell those roses buried under the snow, and all my God-given abilities to do what I want and am capable of.

All inside my minivan.

When I looked around that Church today and I saw 600 people sitting and standing, hands folded, tears on cheeks, and tissues up sleeves, for one man. One man that made a difference to them no matter how slight. I wonder if he knew that he touched that many hearts? I have no doubt that as Clinton’s soul saw them all, he was honored.

I saw Greatness today. The true Greatness of another human being. For Clinton, his life has ended suddenly but as I took yet another bite of Potato salad I realized that I still have mine. It was stuffed inside my minivan and as we went by each accident and I saw that at any moment, my life could end too whenever my ticker tape rolls up, all I could do was take those things that I have been blessed with and decide that in some way, shape or form, I want to be what Clinton was to so many.

I want not to be selfish or arrogant, but to aspire to the knowing that 600 people in my life can say that I too, was a good person and I was worth being here on Earth. As cliché as it sounds, and I know it does, but I want to be my best and I want to love my best.

If I can love my children and my Husband anymore than I do now, or love my parents anymore, or my friends and other family, then I do.

There were many things inside my minivan today, but it is outside of it that I place my footprint and it is within it all of that where I want to Live before I die.

But please, no more Eggs. Not now.

It's Here!!!

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 20:04:00 +0000

So I escaped for a while. Okay, make that a long while. 2, almost 3 months has past since my last post and now it’s time I get back into the groove of things. To give a brief explanation as to where I have been hiding. In short, I’ve been with my family. November was a tough month for all of us as shortly after my last post we began attending funerals. Between Glen’s family and mine, 7 Uncles have either been diagnosed with a horrible disease or have passed away from one. Needless to say, after seven loved ones, I’ve had enough egg salad sandwiches.

Christmas came and went and I enjoyed every minute of it. We stayed put, refused to load the kids up in the van, and after 3 years, finally had a Christmas at home. It was wonderful. My husband had to work throughout but it worked out well. We had a huge family supper at my mother’s house and not short of 44 guests enjoyed a huge potluck. On comes the New Year and I’ve been in my basement, working like a dog trying to get every inch of my business venture up and running. Meeting with an accountant, setting up prices and packages, paperwork, advertising, and the biggest thing of all:

My Website!!

I’m so exciting about it. I’ve worked really hard trying to design something that would allow me to do exactly what I want: make it easier for me and easier for you. There are online galleries that will allow you to share a link to family and friends so they can see your photos too, download them if they like and purchase prints online! I’ve teamed up with Smugmug who provide an excellent service and fantastic quality products for a great price. These prints can be delivered right to your door, so you don’t have to do a thing. I’ve learned so much HTML code, CSS code, and every other type of code that I think I’ve turned into a slight geek, lol. (btw, I love geek’s). I’ve crashed-coursed it with the help of Google (I love Google too) and a VERY patient husband as well as some direct phone calls to a SmugMug customizer David Wolf, who listened to my ignorance with code with the flair only a Yankee can muster… lol.

Speaking of the US of A, I have to say that I’m really kinda beaming with some pride about the recent inauguration of their 44th President, Barack Obama. If you didn’t get a chance to see it (where were you??) it was astounding to see the number of people come together to show their support for one another and this new administration. It was amazing that with an estimated 1.8 million people in attendance that there wasn't a single incident or arrest made. I can't imagine the number of photos that were taken of that day. Speaking of which, if you weren't watching CNN that day, you probably missed this really cool technology, called Photosynth. CNN coloaborated with it's audience and took every photo uploaded of President Obama's Oath ceremony and put them all together to form The Moment. If you haven't seen it yet, check it out.

Don't forget the Exclusive Tab for current deals and promotions!! Please explore around, checking out links, viewing photos, etc. I would really appreciate any feedback that you may have or if you notice any errors that I may need to address. I am slow at Code but I will do my best to get it corrected.

In the meantime, I'm going to emerge from my basement and start snapping photos again. I've had enough of the behind the scenes business stuff and I'm hoping I've go enough done to at least present myself with some style. I'm looking forward to this year and meeting new faces, and most of all, taking photos of those new faces.

See you around!

Strength of 3 Men

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 05:33:00 +0000

I’m not sure what to post right now, other than I’m sad. Two awful diseases reared their ugly heads and staked a claim in the strong and determined bodies of three Uncles. 2 of mine, one of my husbands.

Scleroderma, more appropriately, Diffuse Scleroderma was the first. It’s a hardening or thickening of the skin and other organs caused by an over production of collagen. Normally something that the rest of society craves more of, this increase in collagen affects the amount of blood and oxygen that gets carried to the rest of the body. My Uncle S. was diagnosed years ago and has had a huge battle against this persistent stalker. In and out of the hospital with his wife, kids, and grandkids by his side encouraging him and giving him the determination to fight for the right to live.

His lungs got it. His oxygen tank became his new best friend and took claim by his side even when he continued on with his joys of life; strapping the tank next to him on the quad and heading out into the backcountry, a smile plastered on his face.

We recently received the news that he was finally going to get his lung transplant. The biggest obstacle was transferring him from the small hospital where he was residing for a short time, to a much larger, more equipped facility. Up in the air he went, only to come back a short 40 mins later, landing in ICU. He’s been there ever since while family members from one end of Canada to the other all wondered, questioned, hoped and prayed that someway, somehow, it would all pan out. A Facebook group was started where 366 members posted their anticipations and desires.

I received a call today from one of my Aunts where the news wasn’t what we; I had hoped. The most difficult decision was made that one of the strongest people I know, wasn’t strong enough to make the trip. Not strong enough to have surgery. Not strong enough to stay in ICU. And barely strong enough to make the trip down the hall to a private room.

It’s strange not being there and only hearing snippets from family members passing around the snippets of information they hear. Trying to weed out the what’s, the when’s and why’s. The last I heard, he’s holding on for his sons. The one by his side, the other on his way. The last I heard, he said he’s “okay”; “not afraid”; “ready”.

The Uncle that I have always loved and looked up to, the man that was so broad and rugged, the one that can hardly speak without losing breath, is much stronger than his physical body is letting us believe. A man that is “okay” has incredible courage and power, faith and vigor. He has come to peace.

Even though I am saddened by the news I received today, I know that if he says he’s “okay” then I believe him. I, however, am not.

~~~
It is not only Uncle S. that is engaged in a war against his own body, but another strong man, another man that I love and have always admired, Uncle E. His battle? Cancer.

His cancer is determined to get the best of him. It was diagnosed only a short while ago with aggressive treatments of chemo, radiation and surgery following. New stem cells were added and the outlook was good but his comfort level wasn’t. Pain and discomfort emerged amongst the day to day living with this toxin plaguing his system. A birthday gift in the form of a CT scan showed two more masses. Two masses that toy with the surgeons; RISK is their game and the doctors are losing.

A timeline was given with options of pain relief. They can reduce the speed of the cancer but not it’s monstrous effects. More radiation and more frustration. Family that is torn between provinces, between battles, between the need for comfort, empathy, love, and prayers. Two sisters both dealing with devastating news about the men in their lives, their husbands. Children, nieces, nephews, cousins, siblings, parents all trying to come together and reach out to one another.

~~~
It wasn’t but two weeks ago when we received yet another call. This time is was Glen’s Uncle. Cancer struck again. It put its filthy claws into another good man. At the end of this week, he will have surgery with aggressive chemo and radiation treatments to follow. A hard working farmer than never let a day go by without being in the field, or a fellow go by without a need being met, now stuck in the city’s cancer unit imagining the smell of the golden harvest and the big blue skies.

~~~
It’s my Parents’ anniversary today. A day that is filled with memories of a commitment to love clouded over with sour news. In a bittersweet way, an oxymoron at best, a day that reminds me of marriages has me thinking of funerals where it is these two gatherings that demonstrate the importance of love and family.

Even though I am saddened by the news of today and the past few weeks, it is encouraging to see the outpouring of so much support towards these 3 men and their wives that stand beside them, holding them up and gently guiding their fall from what they lived to what they live now.

“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” – Mahatma Gandhi

I still hope for a miracle of sorts, an end to suffering, a chance at life, a cure. I hope like millions of others that have had bad news today. Just know that I’m there with you. I’m here doing what I can, telling my story and encouraging those that can, to do what you can. Pray. Hope. Educate. Donate.

Take care of yourselves,

Goodnight.

Scleroderma Society of Canada

Canadian Cancer Society

Trains, Games and Spider-Man???

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 18:50:00 +0000

Trains, trains, and more trains. What would make a 3 year old boy any happier? Well, how about a midway with games and a Ferris Wheel, pony rides, presents, cake, and of course, spiderman.

With a birthday held at Fort Edmonton Park, this little 3 year old had all his spidey senses tingling with so many exciting things to see and do. Kids spread from one end of the park to the other coming together to share the fantastic, made-by-mom, cake and the delicious Hobo's Lunch aboard the Railway Dining Car. A trip (okay, maybe 2) around the park on the train with a stop by for a gallop with the ponies made the day complete.

I had a really tough time narrowing down this batch as I loved so many shots. There were so many amazing things to capture. We all had a blast and Ethan is STILL reminding me of the need to have another train ride.

Please check out the whole slideshow as I really LOVE this session. I couldn't possibly choose just a few to blog!

Breaking a Sweat

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 22:27:00 +0000

I don’t know if it’s because I’m new at photography, or if it’s because this particular family are friends of mine, but the nerves struck again as I attempted my first family session. I’m really glad that they were okay with a newbie like me taking their pics to help commemorate the 70th birthday and the 1st birthday of two of its members.

I tried having the shoot in the early evening in hopes that the high sun would start to dip, giving relief of the 30+ degree weather smoldering the earth that day. With the absence of clouds, and bedtime beckoning the little gaphers, I worked up a sweat trying to avoid squinting eyes and harsh contrast.

My two kiddo’s tagged along and I think my lil’ guy was too distracted by a certain someone’s beauty and cuteness that he wound up in some of the pics but hey, I’m a little biased with my viewfinder.

Pre Wedding Jitters

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 09:15:00 +0000

Well I finally got the chance to do what most photographers aim to do at some point. I got to photograph a wedding. I got to tag team alongside a very talented photographer, Amber Lee of Amber Lee Photography, and the whole time I was gearing up for it, I was shakin’ in my knickers.

I mean, this is a wedding. Someone’s magical moments. I better not flub this up. What if my camera craps out on me? What if I forget to put in my memory card? Or worse yet, leave the lens cap on?? Is Hope nuts? I’m not ready for this. She’s crazy. Yep, spaghetti squash kinda’ crazy. I think I must have had a million trips to the bathroom trying to get the butterflies under control before I left. I can’t go. I’m sick. I have to go. Um, no. I mean to the wedding. OMG, what am I going to do? What if I get lost and can’t find my way to the ceremony? Oh yeesh.

I think I thought every horrible thought a photographer can muster up before knocking on that door. What if this is the wrong door? What if I’m in the wrong part of the city? I’m such an idiot. Ohhhhhh…..

Within 15 minutes of being invited in by Sally and Yvonne, I found friends for the day. Or maybe longer. These people were NICE! And friendly, and relaxed, and just well, so darn happy. That made me happy and oh how the day followed suit.

What a perfect wedding Yvonne and Dan had. Her daughter by her side, a belly full of babies, a beautiful day, a beautiful ceremony, lots of laughs, and just a wee smidge of rain.

Thank you for letting me help you keep some of those memories with you. It was a real joy to follow you around, playing paparazzo for the day. The hardest part now, is narrowing down the gazillion and one photos I have of your wedding. Oh my! Stay tuned though, an album full of photos are just around the corner....

A Precious Bunch.

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 05:36:00 +0000

Another little baby welcomed the world with her birth back in July and soon after, I was setting up shop in their living room, camera in hand to take some pics of her being so darn cute and tiny. Tiny little hands, tiny little fingers, toes, and a tiny little nose. She was loving the camera and gave me a million cute poses! Watch out for this lil one Mom! She’s gorgeous. Thank you for letting me capture those precious little baby photos for you. It was a real pleasure.

and of course her brother wanted to pose for a few shots too! What precious kids.

Mr. C.

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 05:19:00 +0000

So as I’ve been attempting to switch over computers, it has put me behind blogging schedule and time has flown by quicker than I wish. Babies are growing up faster than I can say “click”. I was able to do my first in-home photo session with a little baby that I got to hold on his first day in the big, wide, world. Not only did I get to see him get his head measured for the first time, and being held by his big brother for the first time, I got to take some uber cute pics for his ma and pa to enjoy while he was still a little wiggler. In the mix, I attempted to get some of his brother, but alas, he was to quick for my shutter! Lol. He did manage to stop for a quick hug from his brother and off he went again.

Never More Perfect

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 04:52:00 +0000

Well, I have never been more honored. I was asked to photograph the recent (as in a month and a half ago) birth of one of my mommy friends. Wow. How cool is that? And unbelievably special. I don’t know who was more nervous the day she phoned to say labor had started. Her hubby who was radiating beams of excitement, her or me. Okay, probably her but I digress.

My gear was already, my heart was pumping, and my brain was praying for the easiest delivery ever for such a wonderful mom. Well, I think there was an error in my prayer. I thought I said easiest but I think the big “G” heard, quickest. The next thing I knew, the call was, “She’s being transferred to another hospital and we’re hoping she doesn’t have the baby before I get there!!!” That was from Daddy. He got there in time. I didn’t.

So sadly I didn’t get to photograph his actual delivery into the world but I was there soon after to get some shots of his welcoming by his grandparents and best of all his big, little brother. He was a bit sleepy but I think he was pretty happy to see the new baby bundle. They were little buddies in an instant.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for letting me be a part of such an amazing day. It was an incredible honor to be there for you, getting some photos of little “C” opening his eyes and looking at his two parents with awe. Thank you for a never more perfect session.

I've Converted.

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 06:21:00 +0000

I am forsaking my ways as a PC owner and user and converted to the ways of a MAC. I bought my first ever Apple computer, the iMac, after being swayed by their clever marketing schemes, eventually, abrading my freewill and convincing me there are no other alternatives unless of course I actually like hitting ctrl-alt-delete every 20 mins and rebooting my computer while losing every ounce of work I just did just so I could spend another 20 mins redoing it. PC must think I need the practice.

So here I am, exploring Safari and the wonders of iLife. I took my first One-on-One class today and felt like a complete idiot. I kept expecting to hear at least 4 to 5 steps I would need to complete a task but kept getting told... "just drag and drop". Seriously? That's it? Well then, how do I delete this then? "Just hit delete Ma'am" (okay, so I threw the Ma'am in, but just for effect). So simple that I couldn't get it.

I mean, we're talking YEARS on a PC (coz I'm so old...); everything's complicated. I can take one of those babies apart, and put it all back together, run it smoothly for ohhh, maybe a day or two before I was searching for the Task Manager.

Well, the commercials got me. I caved. And boy, am I ever kicking myself for not doing this a heck of a lot sooner. But before I get too giddy, I DID just get this thing so right now it's purring like a kitten. Well, a kitten that's getting scratched by a monkey maybe. (Read: I'm the monkey). There's definitely a learning curve. Apple may be simple but I'm old and stuck in my ways. Looking for this here and that there only to find out now I don't need it. What's a PC girl to do?

So now I sit trying to reorganize about 8-10 thousand photos and reorganize every document and zip file, convert what converts and cry as I toss those that don't after searching aimlessly on Safari and Google for apps and downloads that can make this ride a little smoother. Setting up Wi-fi, Time Capsules, my printer, external drives, and letting Ethan play his first real computer game...Sesame Street First Steps. He loves it. But as my husband said... "Now look what you did. He'll always want to be on the computer." ~sigh~ He takes after his mama.

I'm still trying to figure this gadget out and pics are sitting in limbo. That's frustrating me more than anything right now but if this thing lives up to the hype, it shouldn't be long before I'm up and running a mile.

So long PC.

Spider Babies

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:47:00 +0000

Warning, if you have arachnophobia, scroll away. These little guys spotted my eye as I was walking in the door. They were dangling nicely from a plant stand (with no plant, go figure) in their egg sack. I grabbed my camera and as I was snapping their photo, they began to uncurl and make their move into the big, wide world. They were spreading fast, and they were a little too close to my front door for my comfort. So my manly, man moved them to the nearest tree and we watched them quickly explore their new treehouse. Amazing little guys.

Sunny Days of Summer

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 07:46:00 +0000

Okay, you can call me a liar. I said I would blog and I’ve been negligent. But in my defense, I think I have had one of THEE best summers with my family. Camping trips, farm trips, carnivals, parades, baking, gardening (okay, I’ve neglected that too recently ~sigh~), and of course photography.

My photography has taken off. Although I still consider myself a total newbie at this, I have really enjoyed every single opportunity I have had to get creative and try to master my skills. And then I call Hope and dolefully complain that I think I buggered something up. Somehow my confidence always gets restored and then I go off to snap better pics. So a shout out to my pedagogue but more to my friends and customers of PixelPie for giving me a phenomenal start and handing out the encouragement. Oh, yes and the gorgeous flowers I received put me over the edge of “Wow, thanks.”

Just to prove that I haven’t been slacking, here are some pics of celebrating Canada Day, A trip to the farm, and some of Edmonton’s festivities, Capital Ex. Yeah, I know. 3 slideshows in a row. But I'm trying to play catch-up.

OH CANADA!

FUN FARM DAYS

A FUNNY FARM

A Whirlwind of Activity

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 20:16:00 +0000

Wow, things have been literally crazy around here. A total whirlwind. I haven't forgotten about this blog, lol, actually quite the opposite. I have so much to write and so many stories but it all has to wait! We're off camping again!

I'm really enjoying this summer. We've spent a lot of time together doing family things everything from camping trips to playing at the park and enjoying the events of Edmonton, which has been fantastic and in between times, my photography has taken the leap forward; portrait sessions, and my first wedding that I just completed last night! I am dying to process pics but apparently I'm only allowed 10 before I leave on vacation. Thbbbbbbbt!

My computer's still giving me grief so I'm waiting on my new iMac! Yippe! Hopefully I can learn it fairly fast so I'm not put behind any further.

My kids are growing like weeds too. I've been dealing with a temper tantrum/no nap phase from Ethan lately and would love, LOVE, any tips to speed this phase up. It's exhausting. It amazes me how long they can last, even when Glen and I try to be very consistent with him and not give any extra attention. While Ethan is all out wailing, and Glen and I are curling are toes, the clock is ticking down the hour, two hours, two and a half.... yeesh. Toddlers are so intense.

Daysha has started food and she is lovin' it! Give her the spoon and she has a blast! lol, what a mess but so much fun! So far, she has loved every fruit and veggie that we've tried her with. I thought Ethan was a good eater but I think Daysha wins. She is all smiles now that she's a big girl!

Anyway, I'm off to pack! Hope you're enjoying your summer too!

Here are a few pics from some backyard summer fun when my niece came over to play.

Giants are Standing on my Shoulders

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 00:51:00 +0000

I burned my arm on my oven the other day while trying to bake a pizza that couldn’t be baked. It was friggen painful. And now it’s itching beyond belief. But it’s minor. And part of me appreciates the annoying stinging sensation. It reminds me that I’m human and for many reasons, this small burn on my arm has humbled me.

Somehow my personality screams, “I can do it! I’ll help you! Let me find out for you! I’ll be there! Depend on me!” I widen my shoulders, sit straight as a die, hold the pose and start problem solving. I’m tough. I’m strong. I’m stubborn. I can handle it. Throw it my way and I’ll forsake my own needs and step in your Crocs; walk your path for a while. Perhaps my needs are to take it all on. Maybe extreme but somehow, no matter the history lessons I have learned, I still get that Feeling that I should help because it’s what I do.

“Whoever loves becomes humble. Those who love have, so to speak, pawned a part of their narcissism.” – Sigmund Freud

So as it is, I give myself away. I’m smarter about it now and I no longer feel the responsibility that I use to attach to it. I give myself the option of choosing what I do and how much of “me” I can give. Whether you consider that “smart” or not is irrelevant because for me, it’s how I manage. I say “I can’t” when I cannot. I say “I can” when I cannot and when I can. Make sense? It’s the Feeling that I always should that’s hard to shake as well as everyone that knocks on my door or calls my phone.

I do a lot for my friends because I love my friends. They give me energy. I enjoy doing what I can for them and to let them know that I really do care. I do the same for my family. But family always brings a different level of energy. It’s the trust, I think, that is unconsciously there, that permits repercussions to surface. "If I don’t do it, then ____”, “I really should because they are family and they did ____ for me” etc.

There have been so many things brought to my doorstep as of late and I am feeling the need to help in as many areas as I can. But there is so much out of my control and my reach. There are too many mountains to move and seas to part. My love is there but all I am capable of right now is to sit back and watch things unfold no matter how much I don’t want the outcome to be what it will be. I’m reminded over and over by my husband and my past, that you cannot help those who are inept of change. It just doesn’t help shake the Feeling.

As I sit with the Feeling on my heart, I sit knowing that I am tired of being asked on my gut. I can count up to 50 phone calls within the last few weeks of a very dynamic Soap Opera playing out around me. I prefer a good sitcom but I don’t have a say. It’s not in their personalities. To dramatize everything and then when the drama is serious, the excitement is at its peak. My nature is for the calm and peaceful so I want to infuse the situation with composure and serenity. I have an idea. Let me help. Why don’t you try this instead?

~~~

My mother is sick. I have seen it coming. She’s had a disease for years that has sometimes been managed but for the most part it hasn’t. I get frustrated with her continual procrastination of something that can be slowed if not stopped. She’s walking in the Crocs of her mother. Why, if she’s seen the results, won’t she do what it takes to prevent this if not, at least do what she can? Our personalities are so different that I have always butted heads with her ways, taking every single ounce of my energy to understand her thinking. I can write a 10 page essay on my theory but it does no good if the results remain the same. I am so unlike her that I don’t understand her but I Feel her pain in the same way.

I am so frustrated, angry and saddened by so many areas that are affecting this situation. The years of denial and neglect, the continual mismanagement of a healthy lifestyle, the absence of support for her, the genuine, innocent, ignorance she brings to it all is beyond my power.

And now the results are in and it’s not good.

~~~

My SIL is dealing with a bedridden, high-risk pregnancy. Her husband is doing what he can to help her and their 11 month old daughter. He’s doing what he knows how and she is doing the only thing she can. Waiting for the twins to arrive safely. I want to help. My husband wants to help. My mom wants to help. But each of us have so many reasons why it is difficult. My beyond beautiful niece needs more than I or Glen can give her. She needs reassurance and consistency. With two other small children, my time gets very divided and my stress level tips the scale. Is that helpful or harmful and for who?

There's no one to blame. Babies go through stages. Pregnancies go through risks. Marriages go through trials. Husbands learn. Such is the way of life.

~~~

Finagle's Law of Dynamic Negatives: Anything that can go wrong, will—at the worst possible moment.

~~~

I burned my arm. It hurts. I am still here baking a pizza that won’t bake.

~sigh~ Where did my sparkly, magic wand go??

Absent Without Official Leave

noreply@blogger.com (PixelPie) — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 23:18:00 +0000

Have you ever had a day/days where absolutely nothing is going in the right direction?

~BIG SIGH~

My computer has been giving me grief; one error after another. I pay a Tech guy $170 to look at it, run the same bloody scans that I already did, to tell me “it’s fine.” Get it home and three more errors pop up. It’s fine for a PC, maybe. Apple. Here. I. Come.

I paid 60$ for a website template that I can’t get to work unless I first edit it with a program that’ll cost me $399. Holy H*ll. So I’ve browsed every other template site out there and find that if I want any quality I have to pay so I’m out that original 60$ plus the dollars to either have a monthly subscription or an annual fee. I’ve tried downloading a few freebies for practice and my web host is causing me grief which leads me to think another would probably be better; then I’m out even more money. If only someone had taught me code in school. And frankly, I don’t have the patience to learn it now.

Glen and I were also headed out for a date tonight. And Holy H*ll what drama. Trying to arrange for a sitter when ((surprise!)) unexpected family come trudging along, wanting a visit with “the kids”. Well now. It’s supper time and the kids need to eat, family needs to eat, and my husband just cleaned my house while I, amongst interruptions, attempted to process pics. Geeze. Won’t anything just flow smoothly today??

Seems these days, my so called “work” day doesn’t begin till 10 o’clock at night and there’s good reason for it. Steady concentration. Well, I dunno how much concentration one can have between the hours of 10-3 a.m. but it doesn’t appear that I can get any other schedule to work. Ugh. This is going to have to change because I cannot survive on coffee alone. I don’t think I drank this much since college and only then it was to cure an active hangover. Kidding. (Believe it or not, I actually studied my buns off. Well, the second time around anyway).

My brain is powering down because I am tired of dealing with all the little things today. Seriously, 8 phone calls between family members, PC errors and a date night that’s gone AWOL. It was a perfect day outside my windows but inside, Glen and I weren’t acting much like partners and the kids were feeling the tension. Hopefully this day will get better soon.

And I’m hoping to post some pictures soon for you as well.

Cheers.

Oh Where, Oh Where Did My Luggage Go??

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 09:21:00 +0000

I had fun with this DLS exercise. Our mission was to take two vintage suitcases and use them as props in a photo shoot. I wanted to challenge myself so I chose to do still life. I find I have to use a lot of creative energy trying to evoke an emotion out of something that doesn’t normally show “emotions” (including my husband, lol).

For this shoot, I used the city as much as I could for the time I had to try to create a unique backdrop for each shot. My steadfast assistant traveled with me, braving crying babies, flash floods and tornadoes to help me get this completed. Okay, the tornado may be a slight exaggeration but the flash flood was definitely a possibility. I don’t think I’ve seen a thunderstorm like it in ages! All for the love of luggage.

At the end of it all, when the sun was well past the horizon, we took to the streets to muster up some people just for the fun of it. Brave soles.

Apologies for Errors

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 17:18:00 +0000

If you notice any errors on my blog, either when looking at pics or slideshows, can you please drop me a comment? I am in the process of switching things over from "Mamabear" to PixelPie" but I have been having some issues. Hopefully I can resolve them soon but in the meantime, if you can help me out by letting me know if somethings not working on your end, I can do my best to help solve it. Thanks so much!

Exhausting Work

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 07:10:00 +0000

Kudos to every Mom and Dad out there. This isn’t the first time I’ve said it, nor will it be the last but parenting is ridiculously hard work with a ridiculously small salary. I’m tired. All the time. Not just when I don’t get any sleep or spend too much time processing pics when everyone else is gone to bed. It’s because I am a parent who has two kids that wear me out. The sad part is that I have excellent kids. So what’s my excuse, really?

Well for one thing, this potty training stage has every one of my creative juices maxed out. How many times can you make it fun for a toddler to pee in a toilet without him looking at you and saying “no mommy. all done. play"? Games, stories, songs, reward charts. It’s all been done. And I’m still doing it. Even when I’m sure he’s given it an earnest try and put his “bo-bo-boys” back on (that’s lingo for “big-boy-pants”) and then says “mommy. pee.” referring to what he just accomplished in his underwear, I calmly tell him we need to clean up, remind him what we’re suppose to do and try to thing of another way to give him the almighty “Aha!” moment.

Accidents. Pee puddles. Am I suppose to ignore them? Just clean it up? Sit him back on the potty? Put him back in a diaper? That book said this, this book said that, a website is spouting off “train ‘em in a week! 3 days! 1 day!” Do I buy more potties and spread them from one end of the house to the other? What about grocery shopping? Seriously. Where’s the toilet in IGA? Do I run from one end of the Superstore to the other? Crap. I have an infant in a snuggly/carseat. Where does she go? Now there’s a puddle on the floor. Breathe. Again. BREATHE!

Monitor his fluid intake. Time his poops. Regular schedules. Schedule schmedule. I don’t do everything the same everyday. We’re busy people. We’re normal. There are Dr. appts, hair cuts, shopping, mail pick up, house chores. I don’t doubt that if I sat around all day long staring at my clock, I would have a really kick-ass schedule. But there is always something that interrupts me (a whole other blog, trust me!). For starters, I have a teething infant that doesn’t always eat or sleep when it would be most convient for me. She does it when she feels darn ready. If she’s eating, then I’m sitting and my toddler is peeing on the floor. Breathe.

On top of that, I am trying to convince my very curious, playful and loving toddler that stopping in the middle of the day, putting down the toys, coming in from the gorgeous sunshine to have a nap is a good thing. Staying in your bed is even better. And because I’m either stupid or a sucker for punishment, I am trying to do this while maintaining his level of independence and respect suitable for his age without losing my patience. Gritting my teeth and trying to say in a calm matter, “GET in YOUR bed.” Ahhh, contemporary, modern discipline. It’s the way of the future. Back and forth between toddler and infant all day long.

It’s a wonder sometimes how I can actually do anything else at all.

And now I have to go again, as my baby’s awake. The third time in under an hour. Poor lil’ girl and her brand new tooth.

Cheers!

Belated Birthday

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 09:55:00 +0000

Well it's been a long time comin'. A month and 3 days in fact. But my little dude turned the big number 2 in May and I'm finally posting the pics. Enjoy! He sure did.

Back to Bloggin'

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 21:36:00 +0000

Well, I honestly didn’t think that it would take me this long to get back to my blog. The withdrawal was horrible. Hopefully I can catch up from where I left off and start posting more of the pics that have found a permanent home buried in my hard drive. Not to mention the oodles that are sitting on my memory cards. Ohhhh, the life of an aspiring photographer.

While I was away I learned the fine balancing act it takes to juggle 3 young children making the daily task of juggling two seem as easy as pie. Well, almost. But it certaintly has given me a new appreciation for all the Mama’s and the Papa’s that do it on a 24 hour basis.

We also held our garage sale and it did amazingly well. I now have clearance under my stairs and my husband has room in the garage to finally set up his tools. Not bad. It’s only taken 2 years. The $500 we made for that helped pay for some landscaping that we also accomplished. I managed to plant some fleurs and we’ll be planting some trees in the next week.

A camping trip, my son’s first black eye, my daughter’s first tooth. It all happened. So I have lots of stories to tell you.

But my most important news is that I have now set up an official photography business. I am working on a website, but don’t expect that for quite some time yet. I have some learnin’ to do first. :0)

I will be building up my portfolio for the next while and will be announcing sessions in the coming months. Stay tuned for that!

In the meantime here are some pics I snapped at the Calgary’s Farmers Market just for the fun of it and had a little fun processing them.

MIA

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:30:00 +0000

Just to let everyone know that I will be MIA for the next little while. I need to help a family memeber right now so my attention will be focused on that. I will post any updates as I can but they will be slow coming. Thanks and see you soon!

Walkin' with Nan

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 09:30:00 +0000

I took these a while ago when we had our first bout of spring so I thought it was about time I shared 'em.

Confessions of an Un-confessed Shopaholic

noreply@blogger.com (Mama Bear) — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 08:59:00 +0000

Come to my house and you’ll see that I have a lot of stuff. Come to my basement and you’ll see even more. And I dare you to look under my stairwell.

It’s a collection of items all in storage. Household things, clothes, toys, holiday decorations, camping, etc. etc. Probably nothing out of the ordinary for a family of four, and you may even have similar artifacts. But what makes me write about my assortment of “stuff” is that a large percentage of it didn’t come out of my wallet. It was donated to say the least. Donated to the poor.

There was a time when I emerged from college, loaded with debt, newly out of a long and dragging relationship that had its fair share of emotional grief, a small town hick in a big, big city, suffering from a bout of depression, that I had no money. Not a lick. I was working 40+ hours a week on the worst shift rotation known to man and getting a regular paycheck that served me no good. I was on the lowest rung of the pay ladder that a nurse could possibly make, working just as hard, and every dime trickling towards a bill. I had hardly a morsel of food in my fridge but I could easily whip up a delicious lettuce and carrot salad. Just ask my husband. Maybe that’s why I fell in love with him. He bought me groceries and I held his hand.

Now the family that I had once cut out of my teenage life seen a need. And I wasn’t without pride but handouts seemed to be as much of a necessity as my old clunker strung together with cardboard and duct tape. So I started a collection of this goody here, that gadget there, a bit of furniture, a bit of clothing, and the occasional mouth of food.

Fast-forward the clock a few plus years and the goodies continue. Although I now no longer see them as necessity and have in turn concluded that this goodwill is now indeed excessive. And it is not directed at me nearly as much as it is my son.

Enter a scene from Everybody Loves Ethan. Marie is played as herself with the addition of a spending problem. Marie sees the extension of her huge heart best displayed in my house as a huge collection of toys and clothes. Not only is the affection directed towards my son but I get the occasional benefit as well. In fact every time the Barones come by it is with something in hand. A bag of this. A bag of that. A trinket here. A trinket there.

Perhaps I am just too highly maintained and if I were to have more of an opened mind I can see that this collection of mismatched items would create a warm, cozy environment albeit cluttered and dust filled. The fact is that I am darn sick of receiving things. It doesn’t make it pleasant to then receive other gifts for birthday’s, Christmas, or any other gift-giving day. Nor does it make it pleasant to even shop for myself or my own family members. What’s the point? They have so much as it is. There is no need. Thus it has robbed me of the little joy of buying that precious toy, or super-delicious outfit because it loses the value of one when they have ten.

I am at the point of trying to discreetly rid myself and the house of the numerous amounts of treasures that have flourished beneath my stairs. (Perhaps Blogging isn’t discreet but I plead the fifth). It has come to this because for many years of gently refusing, bluntly rejecting, getting down-right mad, and striking an air of sarcasm, I get guilt trips. One after another in as many forms as you can imagine.

The stem of all of this have deep roots. From Marie growing up within a large household, siblings sharing and handing-down everything, she now has access to a lot more financial freedom. It is evident when you see her stash of possessions; mostly the wardrobe that Oprah would compete with. One shirt, 5 different shades. Etc, etc, etc. Even though I understand the root system, it will continue to be a problem until the denial of it is lifted.

I am not hard done-by, but if I had the luxury of spending that kind of money, that frequently it wouldn’t be to fulfill a need of ownership. I would rather see it towards a charitable organization, a child sponsorship or three, feeding and clothing the poverty regions of the world. It is this kind of value I want to instill in my children. To know that another toy car or doll will only make them happy until they see the next one but to help someone in dire need will make them happy always.

I have tried helplessly and tirelessly to show the effects of overspending and have suggested many alternatives. Donate towards an RRESP, donate to a woman’s shelter, the Salvation Army, anywhere. I’ve pushed the idea of putting limits on the dollar amount for Christmas items but it has never been adhered to other than by every one else.

It’s a frustrating struggle. And I know it may be minor in lieu of the many other things affecting our planet and our people but my complaint here isn’t on the overall scale of global issues and Shopaholics but on one that loves the idea of “new” and loves to share her finds by crowding my children’s toy shelves, our closets, and underneath my stairs.

My solution? Another garage sale that’s even bigger than the one I had just two summers ago. Please stop by.